Today, January 17, 2018, marks 365 days surgery free!!!
For months I have been looking at this date on the calendar anxiously awaiting its arrival. I know it’s just a day. Nothing magical happened at midnight, I didn’t wake up a different person, but today I can say that I feel better right now than I have felt IN YEARS, and today I can say with full joy that the 17th is a symbol of God’s faithfulness in my life.
Last year on New Year’s Eve, we felt the Lord releasing us to have courage in the year before us. We didn’t know what that meant but had full hearts thinking on things to come. Little did we know that hardly a week later I would be in a new doctors office, being told that I had one more surgery in my future. He told me I would lose a lot of hair, but promised he would fix me. To which I agreed.
In the Bible, the number 17 symbolizes “overcoming and complete victory”. I had believed with all my heart that my third surgery would be my last, but when the date was set for my fourth and final surgery, 1/17/17, I knew something good was about to happen.
And it has… as this year has progressed I have slowly but steadily began to feel like myself again.
“Feeling like myself” is a loaded statement. Walking a road of healing requires a measure of perseverance you can’t imagine until you’re in it. I still get phantom aches and pains, but I have to give them every step to Jesus.
Can I take just one moment to tell you how sweet the name of Jesus has grown to me?
Through times of trying uncertainty, I have learned what it means to sing songs of wholeness and faithfulness without seeing the fullness of the promise. And in those seasons of the soul where you expect someone’s light to wavier in the storm, I’ve felt the fight in my spirit dig deeper into Jesus.
He holds me, He carries me. He literally tears down every obstacle to reach me. If I was the only one lost He would have come and done it all for me. He is so in love with His kids. He’s become strength and a resting place and today I just want to say that complete victory is in Him. It’s in me. It’s in each of us whether we’re standing in our feet or laying in a bed. He is standing over you and me declaring the truth of who He is. And I cannot deny Him.
I am not saying that any of this has been easy or makes me a single ounce better than anyone else. What I am saying is that my “yes” to Jesus has become the most precious thing in my life. He’s held me together and taken my hand, He’s hushed fears and roared at lies.
I know sitting here today I can’t give my attention to every “what if” that comes to my mind. Doubts come, but that doesn’t mean I have to give them the authority in my life that they want. What I have to do is remind myself there was a decree that was made about me at the beginning of time, and that is abundant life in Jesus.
And if there is one thing I’ve learned it’s that God will give me the grace for tomorrow, tomorrow. And He doesn’t wait to see how faithful I am to Him tomorrow before He’s faithful to me today… so why would I do that to Him?
So today if you find yourself in a hard place, looking for the promises of God to show them self true, I hope that my testimony would be fuel to your fire. Maybe you’re not seeing it today, but hang on, because He who promised IS faithful.